Loosen your mental constructs around your current identity

Week 4 - Winter Retreat

This post is part of the 2026 series for paid subscribers to help them navigate the Winter Retreat: Dreaming in the Dark. As we navigate the winter retreat, I hope this post offers a little more insight into the magic of winter.

This winter had a particularly strong way of making itself known. If you live in the northern hemisphere, it was hard to miss how much colder it was and the amount of snow we received (at least in Canada) gave us a reason to skip the gym with all the shovelling we had to do.

While winter is harsh on the outside, when we look deeper we can see it as the invitation is actually is. To go inwards. To let go of the “shoulds” and the to-do lists enough to be present with what is happening within us.

Using the analogy of winter being our own personal underworld, one of the biggest lessons it shared with me is to loosen my mental constructs. To untie the knots of how my mind’s inner architecture decided to build itself to navigate the world. To be willing to uncouple where I held on too tightly. To do this, is to make space.

Too often, we vilify our mind. We must train it. We must heal our traumas. We must let go of limiting beliefs. And so on. Soon our healing journeys begins to feel like a never ending employ of modalities that leaves our minds feeling constantly attacked and pushed beyond it limits.

The mind is smart. Adaptable. And sometimes these approaches are quite helpful. And I propose something a little different.

What if we were to approach our mind and lovingly train it to exercise the muscles of navigating changes safely and gracefully. I’m not talking about change in the outer world. I’m talking about holding space for our minds so that it too can rest and upgrade its operating system in a way that feels natural and takes it’s logical next steps.

I don’t know if there is a formal name for this process, but I like to think of it as loosening your mental constructs around your current identity. As you loosen, your mind naturally lets go of entangled attachments, like a tight knot, strands begin to unravel.

You can now see the components that make up your current identity with a different perspective. Only when your mind is at peace with this process can you enter a space of choosing what remains, how it gets reconfigured, and what you can compost.

This week, inside the Winter Retreat: Dreaming in the Dark, our inner journey takes you in energy space and guide you through this exact process of loosening your mental constructs around your current identity.

I cannot wait to see what you think once you’ve experienced it.

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STEP 1

As a paid subscriber you get access to the four seasonal retreats. Navigate to this week’s exercise. Get cozy and enjoy dropping in for the meditation experience.

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from the underworld with love,

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